Hole (Bottom)


"Hole" is the first episode of the third series of British television sitcom, Bottom. It was first broadcast on 6 January 1995. It is the last of only three bottle episodes to feature only the two main characters, however it is the only one of the three to be set entirely outside of the flat. It is also a single-scene real-time episode.

Synopsis

During a night at the fair, Eddie and Richie are trapped on top of the tallest Ferris wheel in Western Europe, and the ride is scheduled to be blown up the next morning.

Plot

Richie and Eddie go to the fair for the evening and begin to talk about their night out on top of the tallest Ferris wheel in Western Europe. Richie claims that this has to be his last ride of the night as he is "Up to my three quid limit"; Eddie informs him that this ride on the Ferris wheel cost three pounds, thus implying they have just been walking around the fairground all night. Eddie then asks for another go at the "throwing the darts at the cards game," but Richie explains it was closed after the proprietor was sent to the Eye Hospital as a result of Eddie's first go. They then talk about an unfortunate incident on the Waltzers in which an elderly woman was covered in vomit; Eddie states "I had no idea I'd eaten so much." Richie describes that he "whizzed round three times and she looked like the creature from the swamp." Eddie believes that not all the vomit was his as he didn't remembering eating "all those horrible lumps of gristle," to which Richie replies that the gristle was the woman's face.
After another unfortunate incident on the ghost train that proves far too terrifying for Eddie causing him to soil himself. He was just lucky that another man on the ride passed out otherwise he would have never managed to get his trousers off, Richie asks how his newly acquired trousers fit. Eddie replies that they're fine but stands up to reveal a floral skirt. Richie says they appear to have a "skirty feel" about them to which Eddie replies "I think he may have been Scottish." Richie then replies "Oh well, that's all right, the Scots are allowed to be transvestites."
To finish their fun, they decide to go on the Ferris wheel, but the burly ride operator shuts down the ride halfway through a turn leaving Richie and Eddie stranded at the top. Richie believes that the two girls he claims have been following them around the fairground all night are getting on the ride. Richie claims that his girl is very good-looking and that Eddie's girl is not as good-looking: has a beard, smokes a pipe and does not have as many legs. Eddie realizes who Richie is talking about: they are "Keith and Deirdre" from the local pub's mixed couples nudie mud wrestling team. Richie tries to save face by claiming that Deirdre is his girl and Keith is Eddie's, and asks if the two are a couple, why was Deirdre "giving him the eye all night?... Not the glass one, the other one." to which Eddie replies that she's blind. Eddie then tells Richie that the only reason they were following them was because Eddie owes Keith £50 from seventeen years ago. They spend the next half-hour getting on each other's nerves. Eddie takes a full plastic pint pot of bitter from his coat pocket and starts drinking. Then, the lights on the Ferris wheel went out and Richie realizes that they we're the only ones on the whole ride. Eddie blames Richie for confusing the Ferris wheel attendant as a woman, which embarrasses Richie. Richie tries to climb on the Ferris wheel to get help, but the electrics causes him to go back. He asks Eddie to get help and so Eddie walks on top of the Ferris wheel but the same thing happens with the electrics. Richie starts panicking, Eddie slaps him six times to calm him down.
They spend the next half hour at night on the Ferris wheel. Eddie found an article on the newspaper about the Ferris wheel, not only is it the tallest it's also the oldest Ferris wheel in Western Europe, it is due to be blown up in a controlled explosion at dawn as the Ferris wheel is a death-trap and would be too expensive to dismantle starting first thing tomorrow morning. They realize that they must escape as quickly as possible and decide to make a flare in order to attract attention. Eddie reveals a bottle of Brandy in which he has also added methylated spirits, Pernod, Paint stripper, Mr Sheen, Brake fluid and Drambuie. Richie thinks that Drambuie is a drink not befitting a man and makes limp-wristed gestures to which Eddie replies "Well you've got to put something in it for the birds." Richie smells the bottle as asks Eddie in a puzzled manner "How are you alive?" Eddie taps his nose and replies "I may very well not be." Richie enplanes the whole plane when he then spots a police helicopter, he lights the bottle in the same manner as a Molotov cocktail, and throws it in the air. The makeshift flare fails to burst and ends up falling back into the Ferris wheel seats causing the floor between the seats to catch fire. Thinking they will now be seen, Richie tells Eddie to start waving and shouting to the chopper, to which Eddie points out their predicament by sarcastically asking if they're shouting for help "because they're stuck on the top of a ferris wheel or because they're burning to death!" Richie realizes Eddie is right and forces him to pour his second "Emergency" glass of bitter onto the fire. Eddie does so, but becomes tantrum and states to Richie "I will never ever ever forgive you for this."
After the fire has been put out, Richie stamps on it as if he had been the brave one. This causes the floor to collapse and results in him hanging by his fingertips, Eddie pulls him back up by his hair and called him "overweight", which annoys Richie. Eventually one of the Ferris wheel seats snaps because of Richie's weight and they are left hanging 350 feet in the air. Eddie quickly becomes a Buddhist because he wants to be reincarnated as Claudia Schiffer, Richie taking interest wanted to be reincarnated as Dannii Minogue. The Ferris wheel seats started to become loose then ever. Richie decides that they should start to pray, to which Eddie asks "Who to, Buddha?" and Richie replies "No, none of that old supermodel cobblers, the real good old C of E", they began praying to God. A giant hand stretches out to save them and the two climb on moments before the Ferris Wheel seats fall to the ground. Eddie turns to Richie and states "Although we—and indeed the whole BBC—respect people's rights to believe in whatever they wish…"; at this point he turns to the camera and breaks the fourth wall of theatre and parenthetically adds, "Because we don't want to get into the shit on this one."; turning back to Richie he finishes with "We don't actually believe in God." Richie realises Eddie's right, and the two exclaim "Shit!" as the hand disappears and the two plummet.

Consistency errors